Is everyone inside and dry yet? Did anyone else forsake their umbrella because it was just too windy to hold one up? That's the worst combo--you get soaking wet and cold, and look like a weirdo walking around with your umbrella folded while rain streams down your face.
Let's talk about weekends! Mine was again quite an adventure, though not intentionally. Friday night I was well behaved and went over to Literating's apartment (aka Schmauren) to "help her pack" which really just meant pack 3 boxes and then give up. We also ate tacos and shared a quesadilla. I probably went into my flex points but I'm not sure by how much. I was home by 9 pm, watched some of the Haiti telethon, then got into bed to watch The Brothers Bloom, which is a really good movie, by the way. I'm not sure why no one talked about it when it came out, but I had low expectations due to the lack of a reputation, and I was really, really pleasantly surprised. I heartily recommend it. Then Saturday I attended a birthday party in the Hudson River (well, at the Chelsea Brewery) starting at 3:00 pm, which meant I was good and toasty by the time I got back to Astoria around 7 pm (I think.) I met up with the ex to play some pool, then while he was in the front room of the bar watching tv, I kissed another boy I know, and possibly made a date with him. Guys, he's four years younger than I. I'm not proud of that one, but hey, that technically makes three new kissing partners in the past month, so that's OK. But nobody worthwhile, I guess. Still, it's a process! Anyway, then ex and I went to two more bars, including crashing Ax's date with the Terminator (at her request) for a drink, then finally home for (more) tacos. Yesterday was a giant hangover day and I didn't really leave the bed. I did watch Breakfast at Tiffany's for the first time, so it wasn't an entirely wasted day, and I finally was able to do some freelance work in the evening.
Today I feel like a mostly normal person again, though with this weather, it would've been nice to stay under the covers. Especially since I have a hickey and am pretending it's not noticable. OH along the weight loss lines, I received a nice compliment from the ex (I know, roll your eyes) as he can see the difference. He was happy with my shape before, too, but he noticed the change, so that felt really good.
Oh, and about that -- I'm making rash decisions right now, but I'm not ready to stop, so we'll see what happens. Either my crazy control-freak ways will force me to draw a line, or I will be able to relax enough to not need an immediate answer about What the Eff We Are Doing.
Food!
B - coffee, Honey Bunches of Oats, skim milk (4)
L - spicy chicken (Boar's Head Sausalito!) and provolone on sandwich thin, L&T, Miracle Whip light and mustard; pear (5)
D - veg lasagne (5); turkey bacon (2); romaine salad with tomatoes, cucumbers, feta, homemade vinaigrette (2)
S - Dannon Light & Fit yogurt, string cheese (3)
Total - 21
Activity - bike, 40 mins
Flex points remaining - 0, probably
Showing posts with label kissing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label kissing. Show all posts
Monday, January 25, 2010
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Love and What I Ate: Thursday
BIG CHANGE--I've decided to stop dating these entries...since Blogger does that for me. I'm all about streamlining my life.
I'm trying to think of a short-term solution to these cliche winter blahs, and all I can think of is going tanning, which I don't really want to do. Should I lay a blanket down in the living room, put on my swimsuit, pretend the blanket is a pool, and dive off of chairs like I did when I was a kid in the winter? (Obviously I didn't really dive...it was too shallow.) I'm not going to take a trip to somewhere tropical as I'm saving up for a trip to London in April, so that's ruled out. Maybe it's finally time for the Russian baths, as much as that thought creeps me out. My dear Brooklyn Sea Hag (see link to the left) has been wanting to go for years. But...I'm open to other suggestions, friends. Do please submit.
So I do realize that one of the main categories of this thing is Love. And I also realize I've been pretty quiet on that whole topic. Let me give you the situation. I was in a long-term relationship that ended rather abruptly in December, and also ended without firm cause, as one of us (ahem) had some sort of a life crisis and finally faced his inability to function successfully in a committed, loving partnership. I am still in touch with this person, although as time goes, I am angrier about the whole situation. I myself am a fixer, and I think if something's wrong with my life or myself, why not do what I can to improve it? But apparently this is rare and strange. This makes me angry inside, but I am also quite calm about it, especially during the day. Sometimes I think too much before bed and can't fall asleep, but the exercising helps with that. Essentially, I am OK, but I am still trying to navigate this post-breakup "friendship" that sometimes I want to have and sometimes I don't. I mean, being in touch every day this week may just be too much, right? I need a cleaner break, I think, but I'm still figuring out how to handle it, since I also care about this person's wellbeing. I just may slow down my response time.
Rambling... Essentially, that's where I am with the past thing, and I'm looking forward and optimistic about something new, but I also feel like it's a bit too soon right now. I see this winter as my time to feel good about my physical self again, replenish my mental self, and enjoy my loving, fun friends as much as possible, as well as get out, be social, and meet people. But then, you know, stuff happens and I kiss a boy. I don't want this boy to be my boyfriend, as though he is intelligent and interesting, I do think our lifestyles aren't so compatible. But that KISSING was amazing. I'd forgotten what really good kissing was like, and I'm feeling a bit hooked. Like, can I please have more of that immediately, hooked. The only problem is the whole emotional mess that comes with it, plus the fact that I'm not exactly looking to take it too far sexually, which always makes those situations awkward. What to do? I guess I need to just relax and not focus so much on THAT ONE person's kissing, but think about the fun and fancy-freeness of it all. And the next kisser?
I am so not fancy free. Tips on that would also be appreciated.
Abrupt change of subject, food:
B - coffee, Honey Bunches of Oats with Strawberries, skim milk (4)
L - chicken and swiss on sandwich thin with L&T, Miracle Whip light and mustard; pear (4)
D - brown rice with vegetable tomato sauce and cubed chicken (7); romaine salad with tomatoes, cucumbers, feta, homemade vinaigrette (2)
S - Dannon Light & Fit yogurt (1), light string cheese before book club(2)
Total - 20
Activity - Some walking to/from book club after work, typing like a demon at work
Flex points remaining - 35
I'm trying to think of a short-term solution to these cliche winter blahs, and all I can think of is going tanning, which I don't really want to do. Should I lay a blanket down in the living room, put on my swimsuit, pretend the blanket is a pool, and dive off of chairs like I did when I was a kid in the winter? (Obviously I didn't really dive...it was too shallow.) I'm not going to take a trip to somewhere tropical as I'm saving up for a trip to London in April, so that's ruled out. Maybe it's finally time for the Russian baths, as much as that thought creeps me out. My dear Brooklyn Sea Hag (see link to the left) has been wanting to go for years. But...I'm open to other suggestions, friends. Do please submit.
So I do realize that one of the main categories of this thing is Love. And I also realize I've been pretty quiet on that whole topic. Let me give you the situation. I was in a long-term relationship that ended rather abruptly in December, and also ended without firm cause, as one of us (ahem) had some sort of a life crisis and finally faced his inability to function successfully in a committed, loving partnership. I am still in touch with this person, although as time goes, I am angrier about the whole situation. I myself am a fixer, and I think if something's wrong with my life or myself, why not do what I can to improve it? But apparently this is rare and strange. This makes me angry inside, but I am also quite calm about it, especially during the day. Sometimes I think too much before bed and can't fall asleep, but the exercising helps with that. Essentially, I am OK, but I am still trying to navigate this post-breakup "friendship" that sometimes I want to have and sometimes I don't. I mean, being in touch every day this week may just be too much, right? I need a cleaner break, I think, but I'm still figuring out how to handle it, since I also care about this person's wellbeing. I just may slow down my response time.
Rambling... Essentially, that's where I am with the past thing, and I'm looking forward and optimistic about something new, but I also feel like it's a bit too soon right now. I see this winter as my time to feel good about my physical self again, replenish my mental self, and enjoy my loving, fun friends as much as possible, as well as get out, be social, and meet people. But then, you know, stuff happens and I kiss a boy. I don't want this boy to be my boyfriend, as though he is intelligent and interesting, I do think our lifestyles aren't so compatible. But that KISSING was amazing. I'd forgotten what really good kissing was like, and I'm feeling a bit hooked. Like, can I please have more of that immediately, hooked. The only problem is the whole emotional mess that comes with it, plus the fact that I'm not exactly looking to take it too far sexually, which always makes those situations awkward. What to do? I guess I need to just relax and not focus so much on THAT ONE person's kissing, but think about the fun and fancy-freeness of it all. And the next kisser?
I am so not fancy free. Tips on that would also be appreciated.
Abrupt change of subject, food:
B - coffee, Honey Bunches of Oats with Strawberries, skim milk (4)
L - chicken and swiss on sandwich thin with L&T, Miracle Whip light and mustard; pear (4)
D - brown rice with vegetable tomato sauce and cubed chicken (7); romaine salad with tomatoes, cucumbers, feta, homemade vinaigrette (2)
S - Dannon Light & Fit yogurt (1), light string cheese before book club(2)
Total - 20
Activity - Some walking to/from book club after work, typing like a demon at work
Flex points remaining - 35
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