This will be brief, but as I'm beginning my grand return to the world of Weight Watchers (starting yesterday), I figured I should also begin my grand return to accountability.
First off, I threw out my scale in the bed bug panic of 2011, and I'd sort of been lax about diet (there are so many treats to eat) and just trying to walk a lot so that I could have a healthy, active lifestyle. Guess what. I can't! It's not enough -- at least, not when you combine relaxed diet and exercise. I have felt bigger, and my clothes have felt tighter, though I was hoping some of that was from the high-heat drying, but at Hike's mom's house this past weekend, I noticed her scale and was curious. GASP. It's high, folks. It was like 153 pounds high.
I've also noticed my insecurity about my weight causing some unnecessary sensitivity with Hike, and the worst of that crested recently, too. We were talking about why we argue/misunderstand each other, and the issues I've been having with not being happy with myself, and I asked if he even noticed my weight change, and he said "You want me to be honest, right? I could see it a little in your stomach, but that's only because you pointed it out a few times." SO WHAT THE MAGAZINES TELL US IS TRUE, LADIES: If you draw attention to your insecurities, those spacey boys will notice what they did not notice before. SO WE MUST STOP TALKING ABOUT IT. I even consider myself pretty decent at this, like I'm not a complainer and I'm generally satisfied with my reflection, but yikes, it's so easy to fall into this mud puddle, huh?
So perfect storm time, since the receptionist at work has been talking about going back on WW and she was telling me how great the PointsPlus system is (which I'd previously refused to follow). I investigated it and was hooked -- it's like the same game but updated! New rules, new values, new puzzles! I can also eat about what I usually eat on a normal weekday, but I'll be more mindful at dinner and then on weekends I'll have to clean up my act a bit. I also returned to the gym last night, and rode the bike for 30 minutes and felt good. Unfortunately my membership expires on November 30, so I'll have to try to sweet-talk my way into a 6-month renewal or something, since I won't be living in my apartment for another whole year and this gym is so ghetto, the only draw is that it's around the corner. Anyway, we'll figure that out at the end of the month.
I'm looking forward to feeling comfortable in my clothes again (literally and figuratively) as well as comfortable getting my tummy rubbed by Hike. And the best part (well, one of them) is that I can still eat my Superfoods Pumpkin Pudding! It's pretty low points, especially since I use Splenda for baking instead of sugar. (And by the way, when I first found this recipe, Patty had no claim over it, so I refuse to acknowledge her name in the title. F that B.)
And that's about it here. Still trying to stay patient and happy with the stress of Hike's very full schedule and my own supportive role, plus trying to manage a social life while maximizing my time with him. We are constantly making progress but I do get discouraged when we have a particularly bickery week, like last week. At least we were able to be "intimate" (ahem) twice over the weekend, and it had been a full week before that -- which I know puts me on edge! So now I feel better and I'm very excited about this WW+ plan. I am tracking my food on my phone app, too, so I won't be getting too detailed here, but my main weekday food will consist of:
B - cereal, coffee, milk, apple
L - turkey or chicken sandwich on a Sandwich Thin or a Bagel Thin (the Everything ones are delish!) with lettuce, tomato, honey mustard; light string cheese; fruit; special K bar with chocolate
D - varies
S - yogurt with fruit in the afternoon; pumpkin pudding or something similar and sweet after dinner
Here we go! Oh, right, and I have to buy a scale -- it's clear I work best with hard data. (Yes, that is what she said.)